becoming sandy
Sharing what I am learning, unlearning and relearning as I navigate my way through a midlife unraveling and awakening, becoming the woman I was meant to be all along.
"Put simply, authenticity means you're true to your own personality, values, and spirit, regardless of the pressure that you're under to act otherwise. You're honest with yourself and with others, and you take responsibility for your mistakes." -Author Unknown Authenticity seems like the buzz word of the last decade, and I have used it often when asked what I'm looking for. I have longed for and continue to strive for authentic relationships, an authentic faith, and ultimately, an authentic self. In order to achieve these, I need to answer a few questions for myself. What does it mean to be authentic? What is holding me back? Where will I start? According to Brené Brown, "Authenticity is the daily practice of letting go of who we think we're supposed to be and embracing who we are.” To me, this has been a daunting task. I have spent so many years molding myself into who I thought I was supposed to be that I didn’t realize I was moving further away from the woman that I was created to be. As a “Nine” on the Enneagram, I have a subconscious tendency to morph into what I think others want or need me to be. I have done this for so long that I struggle to know what I want, what I need and who I am. Many critics of the enneagram will say that it pigeonholes a person into list of behaviors. In response, Ian Morgan Cron says, “The Enneagram doesn't put you in a box. It shows you the box you’re already in and how to get out of it.” The enneagram really concentrates more on the motivation behind those behaviors. It has helped me to better identify my own strengths and weaknesses. It makes me more aware of behaviors that are not serving me and allows me to understand why I react the way that I do. With this understanding, I am able to flip the script and identify triggers before I react. I can pause, take a deep breath and realize what I actually feel, think or want instead of repeating the cycle of putting everyone else's feelings, thoughts and desires above my own. As I learn to trust myself, I take the steps necessary towards living a more authentic life.
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About the AuthorSandy is a parent educator, enneagram aficionado, conscious parenting advocate, self trained and proclaimed home chef, and mother of 4 amazing kids. Archives
May 2022
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